20.1.10

Life, Interrupted

I just woke up from a nap.

You know those days when you can't piece things together (schedules, people, your hair, etc.) and the only productive thing you can do is nap? Well I was having one of those days.

I just wrote about the procedure we need to go through to get a crack at having a healthy, full-term pregnancy. While writing that, I was making calls to clients and trying to help C get in touch with the guy who knows where he can get his blood screened. While I was doing all these things I was also trying to figure out what schedule we should take for the procedures.

We have to schedule our LIT (lymphocyte immunotherapy) around the time I would ovulate. All this scheduling is starting to get to me. Thank God my cycle is very regular. I can imagine how more difficult this would be for women who have irregular cycles! That's when you have to go through periodic ultrasounds for follicle monitoring... Argh. So many terms, so many considerations!

Now making a baby isn't just about being in the mood.

When I think about it now I start to worry. What if the therapy doesn't work. Such an expensive process and then nothing.

I have to constantly remind myself (like every hour) that God is in charge.

We can do our part... go through the therapy, schedule our lives, etc. but ultimately He decides what is best and when it's best.

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