It's final. What we have is an anembryonic gestation or a blighted ovum.
We went for our 6th ultrasound (in one month!) and saw our OB today. I was better prepared to hear the diagnosis than C was. He was still very hopeful that the baby's just a shy one.
It's not something easy to deal with. I feel blank most of the time and find relief in watching tv and pigging out (had squid balls, fish balls, lucky me pancit canton, two bowls of ice cream and a bag of raisinets just this afternoon and tonight). Take me away from the tv and junk food and I get weepy. After all, we were on a rollercoaster ride for a whole month and then suddenly we got booted off the ride.
The doc says the good thing is we got pregnant without even trying. We also feel it's a blessing to have been given a "trial run" where we found out that we do want to have kids.
Thank you for all your prayers and kind words. I got weepy tonight reading messages from friends. Thank you and God bless you a hundredfold.