tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-220771562024-03-06T13:07:55.206+08:00Makes Coffee NervousChristian. Filipino. Wife to C, mom to Rafa and five angels in heaven.
Coffee fiend. Homeschooling mom. Kitchen enthusiast.
Notebook and pen collector. I think eyebags are cool. :Dmakescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.comBlogger346125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-49104157851330945582016-05-31T18:13:00.001+08:002016-05-31T18:13:02.383+08:00Spicy Sandwich Maker<img id="id_2ac2_c5aa_10c8_325c" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVsVVWgT7hYzg2uMC557UR1QSh-j2uCHbQC0kvWLia3YPTmaN8eZIH8rfPP7e5THnc-nnMR-UdlNDdt-uhPGaCAqHs0mC2rn-rATSyEINgMRIsW3dCg0H1ef_E811W_QkgG4iF8g/" alt="" title="" tooltip="" style="width: 353px; height: auto;"> <div><br></div><div>Mama, I made you a sandwich!</div><div><br></div><div>Wow! What kind?!</div><div><br></div><div>A spicy one. </div><div><br></div><div>What's in it?</div><div><br></div><div>Sauce. </div><div><br></div><div>What kind of sauce?</div><div><br></div><div>Tomato sauce. </div><div><br></div><div><br></div><div>Hahahahaha!! Ang saya lang talaga. Thank You, Lord!</div>makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-26478700414744194172016-05-24T10:43:00.001+08:002016-05-24T10:43:28.517+08:00Sick Days and Little Hearts<img id="id_e58d_69a9_797_7ca8" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTX4v6262sYrqJxEhNvXHTJ4pchddp7q0yfnY3V1cZGazQclPFV8DXkcufWKEFBh0mY_PjZ7x5dN3cV23wPdGsmtxEBmdj4yFo0L9ncZXgfNEuMF9iOVtTgQAH0pIhDEV_7n9RZA/" alt="" title="" tooltip="" style="width: 353px; height: auto;"> <div><br></div><div>Rafa hasn't been feeling well lately. Coughing and stuffy nose. Fitful sleep and lots of crying. As a result we haven't been sleeping well also. <div><br></div><div>Last night after his Dada brushed his teeth, he went to me for some cuddle time. He said:</div><div>"I'm shooting hearts at you, Mama. The hearts become smaller and smaller until they can fit into your blood and the hearts go to where you need love."</div><div> </div><div>For me, sick days are never easy. No matter how many times I've been there. The fever watch. The cranky and crying fits. Both us and Rafa. 😁</div><div><br></div><div>I'm grateful for God's help through days when we feel most inadequate. </div><div><br></div><div>And grateful for sweet words when we need it most. ❤️</div><div><br></div></div>makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-3983824758857392632016-03-16T16:02:00.001+08:002016-03-16T16:02:51.093+08:00Dinosaur Age<img id="id_d06d_9ab6_7935_1fe1" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijjHBdNGxCN5T1k40fHwrNRQqsmzK8dwsZayjgU2Ub8SaXyOnxEpQzxuwgoBlQe8MXQoYOQFP6ys0NVcanNOLqad4DK2SGkYblKaI69-D4rkGr8R6BnuD0GlsMkB48pQvKjGdwsA/" alt="" title="" style="width: 353px; height: auto;"><div><br></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">We are now in the dinosaur age. Hahaha. </span></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Rafa is also learning how to read and write now. By God's grace, he seems to enjoy reading and writing, and a bit of adding and subtracting. </span></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">He recently turned four. Praise God! I will write about that soon. </span></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">I am so late with new technology but I just installed a new blog app and hopefully it will make posts more frequent. </span></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Thankful for those who still read this blog and those who've asked me to continue writing. </span></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Praying we will honor God in what we share here. </span></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">God bless you! Have a good day!</span></div><br>makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-3235850853985276262015-09-07T11:54:00.003+08:002015-09-07T11:56:21.771+08:00The Reformation of Scar<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.</i></div>
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<i>Psalm 119:105 ESV</i></div>
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A few weeks ago we watched The Lion King with Rafa. He loved the movie and we felt he could relate to a lot of the messages of the movie. Suddenly he was even more affectionate towards C and obeyed right away. Yay! Haha. </div>
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We could tell also how he disliked Scar, Simba's evil uncle.</div>
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Since watching The Lion King, Rafa has been obsessed with us being a pride of lions. Every morning, he would ask me, "Mama, are we a pride of lions?" "Mama, am I your lion cub?" "Mama, are you going to hunt today?"</div>
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Last night C noticed that Rafa had stationed one of his toy lions on top of an open page of his illustrated bible. </div>
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C asked him what was going on. </div>
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He then explained that that lion was Scar and that Scar was bad. He put Scar on top of the bible so that Scar could read God's Word and be changed by it. He said by reading God's Word, Scar could become good. </div>
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He also added that God disciplines those whom He loves and that God will discipline Scar so Scar could be good. </div>
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Hahaha. </div>
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C explained to Rafa that Scar was a sinner like all of us, that's why he needs Jesus. And that if Scar believes and follows Jesus, Scar will be transformed through the Holy Spirit by the reading of His Word. </div>
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We bring Rafa to Sunday School every Sunday. Yesterday he was able to sit through most of the teaching but he kept fidgeting and bugging his seat mate. I just kept praying that he would learn something. </div>
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So it was a surprise and quite an encouragement when I learned of his little Scar scene. </div>
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Part of the Sunday School lesson yesterday dealt with God's discipline. </div>
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I'm so thankful that Rafa is learning about God more and more. </div>
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It's also a reminder for me that even when he seems to not be paying attention, he actually is. My responsibility is to just keep praying and teaching. God will be the one to touch Rafa's heart. </div>
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Thank You, Lord, for teaching us and loving us. May we be faithful in trusting and obeying.</div>
makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-55860987246008538622015-08-20T10:52:00.000+08:002015-08-20T10:52:24.181+08:00Whole Wheat Pizza Cooking AdventureSo last week I wrote about trying to make a whole wheat pizza and I finally made it the other night! Hooray!<br />
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I followed this <a href="http://cookieandkate.com/2013/easy-whole-wheat-pizza-dough/" target="_blank">recipe</a> and I'm happy with how it turned out. Quick, easy, yummy and healthy.<br />
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This is the dough, fresh out of the food processor:<br />
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Next I spread crushed tomatoes, mozzarella and bell pepper before popping it into the oven for 10 minutes.<br />
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Here's how it turned out. I added some basil leaves soon as I got it out of the oven.<br />
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Love this and will definitely be making it again soon! Like this afternoon! Haha! To celebrate the birthday of one of Rafa's friends. : )<br />
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Have a good weekend, you guys!! <br />
<br />makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-76724950137439973462015-08-12T13:28:00.001+08:002015-08-17T14:04:02.374+08:00What's Are You Passionate About?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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My bestfriend's dad once told her that the key to knowing what it is you are passionate about is to check the contents of your bookshelf. What do you read about most? Then that most probably is your passion.<br />
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That was when we were in college. Now I think you can take a look at your browser bookmarks.<br />
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My most bookmarked items are recipes. Haha. Not fashion sites. Food.<br />
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At night, when Rafa has already fallen asleep and I have some time, I scour the net for recipes. The other day I learned how to boil an egg properly. <a href="http://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/how_to_make_perfect_hard_boiled_eggs/" target="_blank">Here</a>'s a good link to that if you're curious.<br />
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Last night we had dinner guests and I made chicken sotanghon soup, chicken tikka masala and herb roasted fillet of sole. I started cooking at around 3pm and everything was ready by 6.<br />
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I'm not saying I'm a good cook. I'm just saying I LOVE cooking. It just gives me so much pleasure. The measuring, chopping, mixing. The different smells (that chicken tikka masala was a dream) and textures. Rafa loves hanging out in the kitchen and I let him smell the herbs. What's not to love about fresh rosemary, thyme or coriander? Sigh.<br />
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The photo above is a snack I served Rafa and his playmates a few weeks ago. Just plain fried saba drizzled with salted caramel sauce. Got the kids eating saba and that made me so happy.<br />
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This week I'm hoping to make whole wheat pizza from scratch. I hope it turns out well! Let you know if it does.<br />
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How about you? What's your most bookmarked?<br />
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<br />makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-38002937647130825192015-04-25T12:52:00.003+08:002015-04-25T12:52:39.172+08:00Belief and DisbeliefI wish I were writing something happy after a long absence but as I write this, I'm thinking about you who are reading this blog, who are going through something similar. Sending you a big hug and asking you to hang in there a little more. Trust God and trust that He is good no matter the situation.<br />
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This sixth pregnancy was marked by a lot of disbelief.<br />
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From the moment I took a look at the pregnancy test strip and saw two lines, I couldn't believe what I saw. I was pregnant again after a really long time of stressful trying, trying to squeeze in some alone time with C while taking care of Rafa.<br />
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It had to be the cycle where we didn't schedule anything and just had fun. Haha. So I really couldn't believe those two lines. C was also quite not sure about it and even asked me to take another pregnancy test! Haha. But those two lines were there.<br />
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We were beyond the moon with excitement.<br />
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We went in for our first ultrasound a week after we found out.<br />
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I would bristle every time a nurse would ask me if I was sure this was my sixth pregnancy. Even after a couple of years and even if we have Rafa now, it is still a touchy subject, my miscarriages.<br />
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Again, the disbelief in the nurses' looks when they saw G6 P1 on my info sheet. I felt like a science experiment.<br />
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We saw the baby's heartbeat at our first ultrasound. It never gets old. I teared up and felt so overjoyed, knowing that little one was growing inside me.<br />
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The second ultrasound a week after at seven weeks went well too. All seemed fine.<br />
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Then the next ultrasound came at eight weeks. I knew at once that something was wrong. After being in that ultrasound room many times, I've learned to look for cues in the doctor's face and in C's face as well.<br />
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The monitor was partly turned towards me. So when the doctor turned it away from me, that confirmed my worst fear.<br />
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We lost the baby again.<br />
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Someone sent me an article about how painful it still is, no matter how early the loss. And I agree with that.<br />
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The moment you find out you're pregnant, you fall in love. Each day that love grows and you dream of how your baby will look, what kind of personality he or she will have. You think of names. You begin a countdown to the day you get to see and hold him/her.<br />
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When you lose the baby, no matter how early, you still pine for those little toes you will not get to kiss, those sweet, chubby cheeks you will not get to nuzzle, soft baby hair you will not get to smell.<br />
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We couldn't believe we lost the baby again. I didn't know what to say to the doctor when she said sorry. What do I say? It's okay. That's how things go sometimes?<br />
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We wept silently and left the room. I was thankful we had Rafa with us and I could hold him and hug and just enjoy him.<br />
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Our doctors also couldn't believe this happened. Everything seemed to be fine. The pregnancy after a successful one is usually easier. The body gets it. Things go smoothly.<br />
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As I start on the painful, physical part of the loss, I turn to C and tell him that I can't believe I'm going to go through this again. The waiting and the horrible pain.<br />
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People ask me a lot how I am. I say I'm okay. I still feel sad, but at least the gaps from sad to happy are longer.<br />
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One thing though that I know is that God is enough. I have learned through this experience that when I am stripped to nothing, when the things I have longed for with all my heart don't happen, God is truly enough.<br />
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I cry whenever I think about this. Pain and joy all mixed into a prayer. You are all I need, oh Lord. I know this and I'm thankful for the pain of this experience because I have learned that there is absolutely nothing I have or want that can fill my heart as much as You do. makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-29766969588010406092015-02-12T00:03:00.001+08:002015-02-12T00:03:35.672+08:00"Mama, please mama me."<div><br></div><div>"Mama, please don't yummy my nose."</div><div><br></div><div>These are some of the funny things Rafa says now.</div><div><br></div><div>Mama me -- to touch softly, to hug, to snuggle, to kiss all over</div><div>Don't yummy -- don't bite or pinch playfully<br><div><br></div><div>Sometimes he is a handful and I get irritated and impatient with him. But then I realize it will not be this way always. He will not want to be mama-ed or yummy-ed forever. </div><div><br></div><div>The day will come sneaking up when he will not want to be held as much and kissed as much. And it makes me cry when I think of that. </div><div><br></div><div>And knowing that reminds me to take deeper breaths when he is being too demanding of my time and touch (he can only fall asleep with me rubbing his belly and him rubbing my earlobe -- go figure). </div><div><br></div><div>I will Mama and yummy all I can while I can. </div><div><br></div><div>P.S. He also said the other day after I playfully squeezed his nose: Mama, I don't want to be cute. Haha. </div><div><br></div><div><br></div></div><br><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgke5re1qr3x_97KvINcNZ2swPC7ejypMf2KgGBq8sTKx2Ue9TpFWHDNOdOViblpQNHqKsTjCZ1jZtDcsaFoSFKVyDHQ_HvQ84-XFVtLubkIkQ0Xmvs08WJYhsSS9Asx6TmKoK7gg/s640/blogger-image--1292812299.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgke5re1qr3x_97KvINcNZ2swPC7ejypMf2KgGBq8sTKx2Ue9TpFWHDNOdOViblpQNHqKsTjCZ1jZtDcsaFoSFKVyDHQ_HvQ84-XFVtLubkIkQ0Xmvs08WJYhsSS9Asx6TmKoK7gg/s640/blogger-image--1292812299.jpg"></a></div>makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-88232046956099794872015-02-02T11:36:00.001+08:002015-02-02T11:44:00.994+08:00Lolo Yoyong<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgdy7B3pcfGTyJniwYjjmVI1qPyOym3kcWEtAj8AuzwrGbavj_OQTFtD2jP_zQnKHpUUwv9BJCItk6ERgfXlntBj58A_dtgORWKhlNKzK6sO_PUZYyhqszmToeBwQQ7OEB1Rw8Iw/s640/blogger-image-871746311.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgdy7B3pcfGTyJniwYjjmVI1qPyOym3kcWEtAj8AuzwrGbavj_OQTFtD2jP_zQnKHpUUwv9BJCItk6ERgfXlntBj58A_dtgORWKhlNKzK6sO_PUZYyhqszmToeBwQQ7OEB1Rw8Iw/s640/blogger-image-871746311.jpg"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><span style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">My Lolo Yoyong went home to the Lord early Friday morning. He was 93. He was a very kind man. My Lola Crising went home ahead of him in 2012 and I just know they are having a grand reunion now. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;"><br></div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">I will forever remember summers spent with them. Leaving their house in Cubao while it was still dark to go to the beach in Pagbilao, Quezon with other lolos and lolas, titos and titas and cousins crammed with us in a hired jeep. Trips to Quiapo to buy Excelente ham and toys. Calesa rides to their old house in Manila. Gallons upon gallons of ice cream consumed early morning to late at night. Eat-all-you-can fishballs from their suki. The funny yet pleasant sound of the pigs they raised in their backyard. The smell of Lolo's pomade and perfume. A trip to a radio station one late night because Lola just had to meet Giovanni Calvo, an AM radio talk show host that she loved listening to. </div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;"><br></div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">Rescue and soothing from countless scrapes, big and small. </div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;"><br></div><div style="color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.701961); font-family: UICTFontTextStyleBody; -webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(130, 98, 83, 0.0980392); text-decoration: -webkit-letterpress;">They lived a very simple yet full life. They loved fiercely and unconditionally. I will forever be grateful that they were my grandparents. </div></div>makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-26649490396657986242014-07-23T20:27:00.003+08:002014-07-23T20:28:28.596+08:00Giving at Two<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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It's been a really really long time.<br />
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I just had to post this because to me, this is really a major milestone. Well, there have been many major milestones but this one I don't ever want to forget.<br />
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While I was pregnant with Rafa, we prayed for specific traits for him. Fear and love of God, kindness, courage, love for country, intelligence and good looks. Hahaha.<br />
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The other night, I really thanked the Lord for giving Rafa a kind heart.<br />
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My parents came over for dinner. My mom gave him some snacks (she's his gluten-free snack supplier) and we allowed him to have some of the veggie loops after dinner. He loved them. After munching on a few handfuls, I told him he was eating the last batch and that he'd have them again the next day.<br />
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He looked at his bowl and saw just one last veggie loop. He picked it up and gave it to my mom. Without any prompting from any of us. I asked my mom to take it. She held it in her fingers and Rafa kept telling her to eat it.<br />
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"Eat it, Lola Susan! Eat it!"<br />
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We realized it was torture for him to see that last piece still in my mom's fingers. Too much torture that he had his hands covering his mouth and when my mom teased him with the last piece, he drooled. Hahahaha.<br />
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My mom asked him if he wanted it and he still kept saying "Eat it! Eat it!". Poor boy.<br />
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Finally my mom handed him back the last piece and he popped it into his mouth right away.<br />
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It was so heartwarming to see him decide to give away something so precious to him (we don't really give him a lot of snacks so these little treats are big things for him).<br />
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I pray for more of those moments in his life.<br />
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Sorry I'm a bit rusty. I don't know if this entry is making any sense at all. I just wanted to record it before I forget.<br />
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Will TRY to write more!!<br />
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#rafaattwomakescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-13363515710049982892013-08-17T13:18:00.001+08:002013-08-17T13:18:12.021+08:00LullabiesI just put Rafa to sleep and as I was singing to him I got weepy. Definitely not hormones but a genuine mommy moment. <div><br></div><div>At night I hum traditional hymns like Amazing Grace or Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus. But in the afternoons (now that our nanny has been away for more than a week and I'm in-charge of his naps), I sing the Beatles' I Will and a string of Carpenters songs (We've Only Just Begun seems appropriate too for a mom and child, no?) and Edelweiss. Please don't ask why. Haha. </div><div><br></div><div>I think it's one of the most touching moments of my day. </div>makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-8287695203993074902013-07-24T13:11:00.002+08:002013-07-24T13:11:38.291+08:00Little Traditions<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1-Js5G-Z06X4uVJmBd2uQyjdasOlCkSxNans_IP_lL_ZT1uKOQljpBfm7-NJn0usbclry494PrY1hbeRYpMrGoKrs2kpAEUhr8h8vZdP3Z1E65U_dZG__49qWaBW8p2now2k4hw/s1600/MommaAndRafaTalk.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1-Js5G-Z06X4uVJmBd2uQyjdasOlCkSxNans_IP_lL_ZT1uKOQljpBfm7-NJn0usbclry494PrY1hbeRYpMrGoKrs2kpAEUhr8h8vZdP3Z1E65U_dZG__49qWaBW8p2now2k4hw/s640/MommaAndRafaTalk.jpg" width="640" /> </a></div>
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C took this photo one Sunday morning. Rafa and I are praying here. </div>
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Every morning, I sit him on my lap this way and we thank God for the good night's sleep and pray for protection and guidance for him throughout the day as he learns and plays and for guidance for me and his other caretakers as we care for and teach him. </div>
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He really listens to the prayer and puts his hands together to say Amen at the end of the prayer. I hope he will remember these little moments when he's older.</div>
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I love you, Rafa. So much. </div>
<br />makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-69630613709547017362013-07-24T12:04:00.000+08:002013-07-24T12:04:05.973+08:00Made Me Smile TodayI love short features like this one. And I think everyone has something interesting to say, if only we take time to ask and listen.<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/vWvDSQAefu8" width="560"></iframe>makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-78731188179948146902013-06-26T14:23:00.001+08:002013-06-26T14:23:36.065+08:00Little Boy Treats<div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2YFgdwKJr3NrKfyDQnCSdUvHoh0obpPTimyVPA0V2QDAMalhecfwebmodEIfDQjNjfBo29wCMHKDJippVamDhJxRT7djB0JIVPvQdaUWarbYeFt7NgWr0kho4GdbGsYxn6NzLIQ/s640/blogger-image-601733693.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2YFgdwKJr3NrKfyDQnCSdUvHoh0obpPTimyVPA0V2QDAMalhecfwebmodEIfDQjNjfBo29wCMHKDJippVamDhJxRT7djB0JIVPvQdaUWarbYeFt7NgWr0kho4GdbGsYxn6NzLIQ/s640/blogger-image-601733693.jpg"></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Rafa's at that stage where I can take him out on grocery and sewing supply runs without much trouble. He loves being out and he's easily entertained. It helps a lot too that he now eats whatever we eat. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Today we spent the morning buying fabric and notions. We had pinakbet and rice for lunch and I had time to spare for a cup of coffee too! Imagine that. After lunch we bought some groceries (thank God for this cute car-cart!) and then headed home. We weren't out of the mall parking yet and he was already zonked out. I'm glad he enjoyed our day out and I'm soooo glad he's tired enough to nap. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">My dream come true: having mini dates with my child. :)</div>makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-77967778061340670962013-06-21T00:29:00.001+08:002013-06-21T00:29:35.225+08:00WavesI don't know why I suddenly remembered Masbate tonight. Specifically that night time boat ride that we took from Masbate to Bicol. <div><br></div><div>We went to Masbate to check on their water problem. We brought people from the ad agency who were going to make a fundraising mailer for us, on access to safe drinking water. </div><div><br></div><div>That trip was one of the most memorable ones in my years with UNICEF. It was heart wrenching to see a severely dilapidated and horribly undermanned municipal hospital. There was only one doctor when we got there and he showed us makeshift beds composed of pieces of plywood atop office tables. It was so depressing. </div><div><br></div><div>When a woman giving birth required more medical attention, they had to transport her to Bicol via banca. A couple hours of rough sea. </div><div><br></div><div>That rough sea will forever be etched in my memory. </div><div><br></div><div>It was night time and raining very hard as we crossed the sea to Bicol. I don't know why we were even out at sea that night but we were. Maybe we all really just wanted to get home so badly that we took that risk (an office vehicle awaited us in Bicol). Or maybe the weather was fair when we left Masbate. But why a night time boat ride, right? Anyway. </div><div><br></div><div>So there we were on that long boat ride. It was raining so hard we could hardly hear one other. The waves were so huge there would be a few seconds of free fall before we landed hard on water again. I remember I had no life vest on as there wasn't enough and I knew how to swim while one of the agency girls didn't. I remember being scared and trying not to look scared. I remember worrying that the agency girls would be mad at us for putting them through such an ordeal. </div><div><br></div><div>Then finally the boatmen sighted land. What a huge relief to see the port lights. I kept my eyes on those lights and felt hope slowly warming my heart. We were drenched to the bone but finally you could see smiles and feel a huge weight being lifted. </div><div><br></div><div>I don't remember praying but I'm sure I did. I think I was having a dry season then in my walk. Otherwise I would've remembered praying and finding some relief there. What I do know for certain is that God was there in the midst of that rough sea, steering our boat and making sure we were safe. </div><div><br></div><div>It's been many years since that night but I don't think I've ever thanked God enough for seeing us through. I feel so blessed I got to experience that. My life would be less rich had I not faced that rough sea. Thank You Lord for saving us and for reminding me constantly of that night and the many dangers seen and unseen that you have saved us from. </div>makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-38336960212461008102013-06-18T11:25:00.001+08:002013-06-18T11:25:33.807+08:00Will To LoveRafa will be 16 months at the end of the month. <div><br></div><div>Just this weekend we observed some significant changes in his behavior. This Saturday I felt like a failure because I couldn't get him to have his teeth brushed. Shallow, I know. </div><div><br></div><div>I'm realizing that I feel the fullness of love not in the cute or tender moments, but the times he is willful and won't let me put him down even if I oh so need to pee. Or when he insists to pretend drink from an old, crusty plastic cup, despite repeatedly being told no. </div><div><br></div><div>Those moments are a test of will, also for me. A test of willingly loving him, despite the urge to get angry and just "letting him have it". </div><div><br></div><div>I can't believe he's not even two! Hahaha!</div>makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-70353994140174202212013-06-10T16:39:00.003+08:002013-06-10T16:39:41.719+08:00NoiseHi! How are you? I know I have been remiss in writing. I miss it too, but mommy duties are never ending, that's what I've discovered.<br />
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Rafa is now a year and three months old. Wow! Can you imagine that? He's able to walk well, run a bit, climb up and down the sofa (yikes!!!), say some words like car, 'ter (for water), there, dada, mama and he has also started doing more imaginative play. I hope I got the term right. But yes, he's starting to make a little world for himself. Lately he learned to give his pet animals some snacks and water. And has also taken to feeding me and his dada with bread. And yes, we take the bread from him and eat it. How could we not?<br />
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So anyway... I have finally found a bible study group and I really am thankful for it! Joined the group late last year and we've finished two study guide books by Beth Moore. The first one was on Daniel and the second one was on Esther. Both timely and very enriching.<br />
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We are on a sort of summer break so now we're studying with some videos by Rob Bell. It was my turn to facilitate today and the material was, I think, perfect for me.<br />
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The title of the material is Noise. It tackles the things that fill out our lives. The noise (audible and visual) that may hinder us from hearing God.<br />
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We're all constantly wired, connected. Constant SMS, updates on Facebook or Instagram, etc.<br />
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Personally I am so thankful that C and I decided not to get cable (although the recent epic Nadal-Djokovic match had us yearning for a sports channel). We get to spend more time talking and reading. And eating at the table properly. That, to me, is a huge luxury.<br />
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One thing I think that I'm also trying to work on is resisting the urge to document every special thing we encounter. Two weekends ago we were in Tagaytay and we had a wonderful view of pine trees and the incessant, beautiful sound of crickets at night. There was also of course the truly breathtaking view of Taal Volcano. C kept urging me to take a picture and I just refused. I told him I wanted to enjoy the view and not be disturbed by trying to get the right framing or angle or light.<br />
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Even with Rafa, I have missed documenting a lot of milestones and cute moments because I was busy savoring them just as they were happening. I regret not having a record sometimes but then I know I wouldn't have completely enjoyed those moments with him and I wouldn't have been completely present in those moments with him had I fiddled with my phone cam.<br />
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This week I pray for wisdom to discern what unnecessary noise I have in my life and the courage and discipline to take those out.makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-65395218771152577642013-04-11T18:39:00.001+08:002013-04-11T18:40:07.145+08:00HeartstringsSo sorry I have been so quiet.<br />
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I have finally succumbed to parental guilt. Haha. Every free time I get, I feel guilty spending it on things that don't concern Rafa. Uh-oh, right? I'm trying to figure out how to strike a balance. Let you know when I succeed. Don't hold your breath. Haha.<br />
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Anyway... Rafa has recently figured out how to use his charms to control us. When we're carrying him and he wants to go somewhere or touch something, he'll plant a big, wet and noisy kiss on our cheeks or mouths. Instant heartmelt.<br />
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A bit of news. One of my good friends and I decided to put up a little support group for women who have reproductive immune issues.<br />
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I know how helpful other women's advice was to me when I was going through my miscarriages. It helped so much to know that a lot of these women had gone on to have successful pregnancies. My friend and I just want to give back.<br />
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So if you're reading this and you want to share a story or maybe hear some stories, please do search Campfire Manila on Facebook. We'll be there for you.<br />
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xoxomakescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-49159954784424950832013-03-01T23:42:00.001+08:002013-03-01T23:45:16.127+08:00Happy first birthday, Rafa!This will be short and probably not so coherent as we are in Singapore at the time of this writing and really exhausted from squeezing in so much in just four days. But I know I have to write something to mark this important day. <br />
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As I was putting Rafa to sleep tonight, I thought about how my love for him has increased (if that is even possible!) now that he is one. I am re-learning that love isn't steady and that it increases in intensity over time. <br />
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I am amazed at this because I probably feared my love and interest in Rafa would wane or settle into a comfortable plateau as the "novelty" of having a "new" child wore off. I'm saying this because I'm the type of person who gets all excited about a new toy, hobby, food or place, only to grow tired of it after a few weeks or months. I know... How can I compare Rafa to a toy? <br />
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It's difficult to explain so I won't. I just know that my love for this little boy has grown with him. And I am so thankful to God for trusting us to be his parents. <br />
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I am overjoyed and filled to the brim with love and gratitude. <br />
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Also, when I lay him down on the bed, he squirmed and crawled towards me and finally settled on my chest. I thought about how long it will be till he won't want to sleep on my chest anymore. And this got me reflecting on my own relationship with my Father in heaven. If I, a human parent, with so any flaws, so long for my son's affection and closeness, how much more does God long for me to draw near to Him?! <br />
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Oh what joy it must bring our Father when we His children draw near and love Him. makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0Dunman View Singapore1.310697 103.895685tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-18327182097690488012013-02-24T11:35:00.002+08:002013-02-24T11:35:53.775+08:00Bottled (blogged) moment<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEio-_-f6pNTNNtdQYxMSfCa8x9DHyIdNJXHqh-E-DUpomJbeXq6ZbiZoFDXojlsGogSugmkcmKYbb8-tLHMnI-741TznPPUskBRZxitMixCh4upFANhDSds3rsT0p4cr5oFPvyD3w/s1600/IMG_0057.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEio-_-f6pNTNNtdQYxMSfCa8x9DHyIdNJXHqh-E-DUpomJbeXq6ZbiZoFDXojlsGogSugmkcmKYbb8-tLHMnI-741TznPPUskBRZxitMixCh4upFANhDSds3rsT0p4cr5oFPvyD3w/s400/IMG_0057.jpg" width="297" /></a></div>
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Rafa is just recovering from stomach flu (first time he's sick since he was born, and just shortly before he turns one at that!) and I know I should write about our experience with that but I just got so giddy with the goodness of the moment that I thought I'd write a quick note about it. <br />
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C and I were reading the Sunday paper and discussing an article on the Oscars (which will be tomorrow) and the merits of each nominee and it was just such a comfortable, engaged and happy moment. You know that feeling where something's happening and part of you is in that moment and part of you is like hovering above, observing? Well, that happens to me a lot (I know, weird, right?) and our Oscars moment just seemed so ordinary and yet so special. I knew at that precise moment that there was nowhere I would rather be and no one I would rather be with.<br />
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For that, I am thankful for, today.makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-39028561293074387262012-12-03T16:28:00.001+08:002012-12-03T23:56:47.594+08:00Our Journey To RafaLast Saturday, December 1, we dedicated Rafa to the Lord.<br />
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We had the dedication at the UP Church of the Risen Lord, the church and garden where C and I got married almost 13 years ago.<br />
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December 1 also happens to be our 17th anniversary as boyfriend-girlfriend.<br />
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We had our family and friends who were a big part of our journey these past three years.<br />
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We wish to give God all the glory and honor. For without Him, we wouldn't have this sweet little boy now. As C says in our video testimony, we wouldn't have come out of our four miscarriages not bitter had the Lord not held us through it all.<br />
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All glory and honor and praise be unto Jesus!<br />
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And to you, my dear blog reader, thank you for sharing in our journey. For reading, praying and sending in your encouragement. Thank you for being there. I pray that whatever situation you are in, that you will see and feel the loving presence of God in your life.<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="480" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/nS7mDh_-cws" width="640"></iframe>makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-49390270155819279252012-11-28T13:17:00.000+08:002012-11-28T13:20:30.493+08:00Rafa's nine months! Praise God!Dear Rafa,<br />
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You are 9 months and a few hours old as I type this.<br />
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You are asleep now in your pack n play, wearing your yellow reusable nappy and your white <i>sando</i>. I love your <i>pambahay</i> clothes. You look so cute.<br />
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This morning I had to buy buttons for a project we are doing and I passed by a baking supply store and saw these super cute paper cupcake liners. I thought they would be perfect for the crayons we are putting on the tables for your dedication on Saturday.<br />
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Yes, we will be dedicating you to the Lord on Saturday. Frankly it feels like your first birthday party. We are so excited and so deeply thankful that God found us worthy to be your parents.<br />
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So anyway... back to the cupcake liners and crayons. You don't know what joy I had as I bought the boxes of crayons and the cupcake liners. These little things make it really sink in that I am a mom. And that I can throw parties for you! Haha.<br />
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Some of Dad's officemates will be taking pictures at the dedication so you can take a look at them someday and see how your dedication went.<br />
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Your Dad and I are so touched at the outpouring of love from so many people. I always joke that we almost never have to buy things because people just sometimes literally appear on our doorstep bearing gifts. Clothes, books, toys, baby furniture... We're kinda set, even for your potty training. Imagine that!<br />
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And for your dedication, so many people have graciously given their "services" for free! Lola Susan will provide the food. Tita Talna and Tito Joven are in charge of the music! Oh and what cool music we will have as the musicians are from the UP College of Music. They are cool dudes, Rafa. I think you'll want to hang out with them someday.<br />
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Even our video testimony was done for free! How amazing is that?! We thank the Lord for touching so many people and for all the love they shower you. <br />
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You are dearly loved, my dear Rafa. I hope you know and feel that even now. <br />
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Happy nine months, dearest. I love you so much.<br />
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Mommakescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-32365647218014497072012-11-01T12:31:00.000+08:002012-11-01T12:31:39.810+08:00Sad DaysSomething sad happened recently.<br />
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Having Rafa has made me take sadness for granted. It's been a while since I've experienced disappointment. It's been a while since I've cried due to sadness.<br />
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I realize I am not exempt from sadness after all. Maybe it's hormones from weaning, maybe not. But I've just become extra sensitive lately and I cry at the least provocation.<br />
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Then I heard this song again today:<br />
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Been a while since I've listened to it. It was like an anthem for me when I was past the critical period of my pregnancy. Suddenly I could feel happiness bubbling up, seizing me and slowly permeating my body. I finally could allow myself to hope. To hope to be happy.<br />
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Maybe it's hormones but right now I feel an immense sadness that I can't seem to reach. I want to take it out and throw it away. But I can't find its roots and I can't pull everything out. Just when I think I'm okay, I tear up. <br />
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I find comfort in knowing that the dog days are indeed over. It's just a little bump I've come to now and I'll get over it. I don't think there will ever be worse sadness than what I have gone through in the past. Maybe I just needed to be reminded of that SADNESS to put this sadness into better perspective. makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-38338711440277553962012-10-30T09:53:00.004+08:002012-10-30T09:53:46.736+08:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNEv39ZikZLHlPmrRBAnRKpEYsdBXt4z-QPZJ-KrO9Zm24L-75U-gNwQEnkGxRn35rfxmvFD7YaPWk1Df0XlEZueuihSD3ohV89hB3sL7okEAhyphenhyphenNlRuZVgFRkX-csnkePHrT4qCw/s1600/LipcupGold.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNEv39ZikZLHlPmrRBAnRKpEYsdBXt4z-QPZJ-KrO9Zm24L-75U-gNwQEnkGxRn35rfxmvFD7YaPWk1Df0XlEZueuihSD3ohV89hB3sL7okEAhyphenhyphenNlRuZVgFRkX-csnkePHrT4qCw/s320/LipcupGold.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
How cute is <a href="http://www.reikokaneko.co.uk/retail/teaware/lip-tease-cup-and-saucer-gold" target="_blank">this cup and saucer set</a>?!<br />
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I love kisses! Do you? C says I was horrible at our first kiss. Hahahaha. Oh well.<br />
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How have you been? Rafa turned 8 months last Sunday and the three of us went out to celebrate a bit after church. It's getting a whole lot easier to eat out with him. He can sit in his high chair longer. The key is to give him a menu or a piece of paper napkin to crumple, munch on, and toss around. The other day I was bold and let him have a wee bit of pasta sauce. Pesto. He seemed to like it. :) <br />
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That's my little update. Kisses to you! Have a great week!makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22077156.post-25438951136191846572012-09-26T23:08:00.002+08:002012-09-26T23:08:42.609+08:00Remembering RunningThat title sounds soooo sad. Sigh. I wonder when or if I will ever go back to running. Part of me misses it, but a big part of me is terrified of it. Here's why:<br />
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makescoffeenervoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02368628737717181339noreply@blogger.com0